2024 Aita for searching my husband

My house growing up was always, if you don't like it, go to bed hungry. OP's partner has been spoiled in the past and is trying to push to see how far he can abuse OP's goodwill. 3. level 2. · 2 mo. ago Partassipant [1] No kidding. At the very least he could ask for what he wants a few hrs in advance. . Altomonte

Also, please be assured I do NOT think I am low-value in any way. I let my husband make me think less of myself on some levels for a short time but now I truly see it was a "him" problem. Obviously we don't share the same goals and values and he has become someone I don't recognize. I know the divorce won't be fun or easy, but I will be okay. Judgement_Bot_AITA • 3 mo. ago. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: (1) I showed up to my husband's dr appointment. My husband just happened to walk by and when he saw me searching his pants pockets. He rushed in yelling at me to put his pants down. I already had a folded piece of paper out but he snatched it then started screaming at me about how I have no respect for his privacy and that I shouldn't be getting my hands on his things. My advice would be to focus on your son, ignore your partners family and don’t get involved with anything to do with your former friend. If she reaches out, tell her to please speak to your husband regarding any issues about their shared child. Its not your responsibility to deal with her. 37. 1. You keep saying he doesn’t leave the house, but that’s his choice, he’s a SAHD. You leaving your house for vacation would be the same for him. He also does all the work around the house. You sound like a misogynist with the reversal of these gender stereotypes. It does not seem like you enjoy your husband’s company. She's my friend, too, I guess. But nowhere near as friendly with me as she is with my husband. I feel often as though I'm third wheeling when I'm with them, as they'll walk ahead together, he hugs her, she laughs at all his jokes, etc. Lately, my husband has been coming inside very late as he's talking with her every night until 10:30/11pm. YTA. This is pretty controlling behavior. I turned my search history off when I was doing research on proposals....he could literally be doing anything.My advice would be to focus on your son, ignore your partners family and don’t get involved with anything to do with your former friend. If she reaches out, tell her to please speak to your husband regarding any issues about their shared child. Its not your responsibility to deal with her. 37. 1. You and your husband are evil. ESH except the forgotten son and your two children that you dragged into this that will be forgotten when your husband moves onto family #3. If his son's cancer isn't your problem, then your daughter's college shouldnt be his problem. ESH but also - f*ck the American health care system. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I asked my husband's niece to give back the expensive gift we got her because she cancelled the celebration she usually does for my birthday, could be the ass because I asked her not to bring her boyfriend to the party and that is why she cancelled. Judgement_Bot_AITA • 3 mo. ago. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: (1) I showed up to my husband's dr appointment. You sound extremely jealous & somewhat controlling. Nothing you’ve written here suggests that you needed protection, so your grievance regarding your husband ‘not being protective’ of you appears to be without merit. He didn’t interrupt a phone call to tell you what was going on & then you were angry over Monopoly. He has a long time best friend, Jack (35M) that has been in his life since before my husband and I met. I like him well enough. The two of them have always been close and spent such a large amount of time together that, at one point, I was almost starting to suspect that my husband was lying about his whereabouts and was actually with another ... She's my friend, too, I guess. But nowhere near as friendly with me as she is with my husband. I feel often as though I'm third wheeling when I'm with them, as they'll walk ahead together, he hugs her, she laughs at all his jokes, etc. Lately, my husband has been coming inside very late as he's talking with her every night until 10:30/11pm. YTA. He was there for you even though he did not want to be. You let yourself stew on him being in the kitchen on his phone (90% of the world can't go 5 minutes without looking at their phone so what is the big deal). You decided to leave because of that and he kept telling you to stay and have fun with your friends. So my husband cheated WITH me when we first met and I think there’s still some deep rooted insecurities there. Thanks again for all of the input Update: IATA. I’ve apologized for violating his privacy. And we’ve talked about my insecurities and how looking through his phone is not the answer. Thanks everyoneMar 1, 2022 · However, this time, the submission is from a pregnant woman who thinks her sister-in-law might be encouraging a friend to flirt with her husband, and the wife wants to know if she's imagining ... Judgement_Bot_AITA • 1 min. ago. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: My husband said I upset him when I said he didn't plan anything. My husband (48M) and I (38F) were at the shopping mall to do some errands. We had to pick up some dry cleaning and tailored items, as well as do some grocery shopping. Problem is, they are both at opposite ends of the shopping centre. Instead of wasting time and doing it together, we both decided to split up, and after I had collected the dry ... The Real Housewives of Atlanta The Bachelor Sister Wives 90 Day Fiance Wife Swap The Amazing Race Australia Married at First Sight The Real Housewives of Dallas My 600-lb Life Last Week Tonight with John Oliver I (31F) work, my husband is a stay at home husband. I love my job, hate house chores and earn well enough to support us both. It's very much OUR money, we both contribute to this family, just not in the same way. Surprisingly my grandparents are a lot more understanding of our situation than people our age. Pretty much this. NTA, of course. But that's almost besides the point. The real question isn't whether OP is an asshole or not. It's whether her husband is so psychotically cruel that he'd intentionally torment kids who just lost their father, or if he is just too dumb to realize that he unintentionally tormented said kids and absolutely should apologize profusely, repeatedly, and ASAP. Dec 16, 2022 · Case in point: a recent AITA post about Christmas party invitations and a difficult husband with over 6,000 commenters calling the husband an asshole. Svetikd / Getty Images. On AITA, people share ... You sound extremely jealous & somewhat controlling. Nothing you’ve written here suggests that you needed protection, so your grievance regarding your husband ‘not being protective’ of you appears to be without merit. He didn’t interrupt a phone call to tell you what was going on & then you were angry over Monopoly. What starts off as just a couple viewpoints that are a ‘little’ toxic and a ‘tad’ extreme becomes an entire identity based in anger and hatred. It is poison to children. Every single one of my fathers children struggles with mental health issues, depression, CPTSD, self harm, and even suicidal ideation. But I tried. And my husband supported me. My mental health improved greatly with his support, although I still had a myriad of other issues making holding a job difficult. After having my son, I had multiple surgeries to save my life, and we decided I would take a break from working and focus of recovery and parenthood. 5. You're NTA. This discussion really should have been done in private, but your husband chose not only to do it in public, but in front of the person affected. You didn't embarrass your husband in front of his friends, he did. That being said, please notice the red flags he's waving. Judgement_Bot_AITA • 1 min. ago. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: My husband said I upset him when I said he didn't plan anything. My mom died from brain cancer and my whole family (including my husband) was heartbroken. But I would never, in a million years, use my grief or theirs as an excuse to make a unilateral decision to host my entire extended family at our house, or to expect my husband to do all the work of hosting such a gathering. Both-Enthusiasm708 Partassipant [1] • 7 mo. ago. NTA when someone is the affair partner, for however long, they have to accept that their place is not that of a family member. An AP is less than in the hierarchy in this situation, they have no legal or moral rights, that's what one accepts when they are the AP. What starts off as just a couple viewpoints that are a ‘little’ toxic and a ‘tad’ extreme becomes an entire identity based in anger and hatred. It is poison to children. Every single one of my fathers children struggles with mental health issues, depression, CPTSD, self harm, and even suicidal ideation. Dec 16, 2022 · Case in point: a recent AITA post about Christmas party invitations and a difficult husband with over 6,000 commenters calling the husband an asshole. Svetikd / Getty Images. On AITA, people share ... Yes, he probably has a problem but you can only help people who actually want help and it is not ops job to break her back to fix him. And I honestly think you are guilting op and that you advise is actually harmful here- even if you are correct. Op doesn't use the insults you contribute to her account of the story. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I asked my husband's niece to give back the expensive gift we got her because she cancelled the celebration she usually does for my birthday, could be the ass because I asked her not to bring her boyfriend to the party and that is why she cancelled. My house growing up was always, if you don't like it, go to bed hungry. OP's partner has been spoiled in the past and is trying to push to see how far he can abuse OP's goodwill. 3. level 2. · 2 mo. ago Partassipant [1] No kidding. At the very least he could ask for what he wants a few hrs in advance. YTA. He was there for you even though he did not want to be. You let yourself stew on him being in the kitchen on his phone (90% of the world can't go 5 minutes without looking at their phone so what is the big deal). You decided to leave because of that and he kept telling you to stay and have fun with your friends. My mom died from brain cancer and my whole family (including my husband) was heartbroken. But I would never, in a million years, use my grief or theirs as an excuse to make a unilateral decision to host my entire extended family at our house, or to expect my husband to do all the work of hosting such a gathering. Daily uploads: https://www.youtube.com/c/redditdude?sub_confirmation=1Leave comments, Like and Subscribe!Love to hear your feedbacks on how we can improve th... Mar 1, 2022 · However, this time, the submission is from a pregnant woman who thinks her sister-in-law might be encouraging a friend to flirt with her husband, and the wife wants to know if she's imagining ... Pretty much this. NTA, of course. But that's almost besides the point. The real question isn't whether OP is an asshole or not. It's whether her husband is so psychotically cruel that he'd intentionally torment kids who just lost their father, or if he is just too dumb to realize that he unintentionally tormented said kids and absolutely should apologize profusely, repeatedly, and ASAP. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I said my husband is jealous of my relationship with our daughter. 2) I think i was rude. One ongoing issue we have is my husband’s frugality. He likes to control my spending and have the final say on how he uses his earnings. It’s worth mentioning that I’ve never used any of his income and have no intention to do so. However, the main point of contention between us is his frequent visits to food banks. Judgement_Bot_AITA • 3 mo. ago. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: (1) I showed up to my husband's dr appointment. I separated from my husband for 7 months and I saw a side of my dad and brother I never thought I would. They treated me terribly and sided with my husband completely. On multiple occasions they both told me to beg my husband for forgiveness even though we separated because of the way he was treating me. OP get a family photo of your family and include your husband smiling to mail to every member of his family. Put it in a nice frame with your maiden name family engraved on the frame. Have children and send constant photos of the new baby giggling with your parents and siblings. But I tried. And my husband supported me. My mental health improved greatly with his support, although I still had a myriad of other issues making holding a job difficult. After having my son, I had multiple surgeries to save my life, and we decided I would take a break from working and focus of recovery and parenthood. Judgement_Bot_AITA • 3 mo. ago. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: (1) I showed up to my husband's dr appointment. My theory is that Jake is a narcissist that’s obsessed with OP’s husband’s status, success, or looks - but that aside, he may be upset that OP’s husband doesn’t see his partying days with his friends as the best times of his life anymore, as he is making new memories and a fulfilling life with OP as his main focus while Jake is stuck ... NTA. In my household once you are 10, you do your own laundry. If my 10 year old boys can do laundry, your grown man can do laundry. Now I have one two adults sons who do their own laundry and a just turned 9 year old who is almost there. And my husband has always done his own. The only thing I or hubby do for the house is towels and linens. Pretty much this. NTA, of course. But that's almost besides the point. The real question isn't whether OP is an asshole or not. It's whether her husband is so psychotically cruel that he'd intentionally torment kids who just lost their father, or if he is just too dumb to realize that he unintentionally tormented said kids and absolutely should apologize profusely, repeatedly, and ASAP. My advice would be to focus on your son, ignore your partners family and don’t get involved with anything to do with your former friend. If she reaches out, tell her to please speak to your husband regarding any issues about their shared child. Its not your responsibility to deal with her. 37. 1. It's like he's looking for this perfect, needle-in-a-haystack job. Meanwhile, I'm drowning in my job and housework to give him space and time. I told him he's being too picky and is eliminating huge opportunities and he got pretty upset with me. He said he just wants me to be supportive.Yes, he probably has a problem but you can only help people who actually want help and it is not ops job to break her back to fix him. And I honestly think you are guilting op and that you advise is actually harmful here- even if you are correct. Op doesn't use the insults you contribute to her account of the story. NTA It is actually pretty common to have gifts go to the kids rather than the spouse, usually because of tax implications because the both of you seem to be doing well. Leaving the money to your husband could see a lot more going to taxes.”. “But the reality is that he doesn’t need it. Inheritances are really your money to do with, not ... You keep saying he doesn’t leave the house, but that’s his choice, he’s a SAHD. You leaving your house for vacation would be the same for him. He also does all the work around the house. You sound like a misogynist with the reversal of these gender stereotypes. It does not seem like you enjoy your husband’s company. YTA. He was there for you even though he did not want to be. You let yourself stew on him being in the kitchen on his phone (90% of the world can't go 5 minutes without looking at their phone so what is the big deal). You decided to leave because of that and he kept telling you to stay and have fun with your friends. YTA. This is pretty controlling behavior. I turned my search history off when I was doing research on proposals....he could literally be doing anything. You and your husband are evil. ESH except the forgotten son and your two children that you dragged into this that will be forgotten when your husband moves onto family #3. If his son's cancer isn't your problem, then your daughter's college shouldnt be his problem. ESH but also - f*ck the American health care system. You sound extremely jealous & somewhat controlling. Nothing you’ve written here suggests that you needed protection, so your grievance regarding your husband ‘not being protective’ of you appears to be without merit. He didn’t interrupt a phone call to tell you what was going on & then you were angry over Monopoly. I’d recommend you pack two sets of suitcases and drop them and the kids off at his mums too. If he expects you to clean the place, he needs to look after the kids and give you some additional free time too. If he wants to complain, he can go push four 8 pound turds out his asshole. 2.6K. 2. I’ve (28) been with my husband (31) for 5 years, married for 2. One daughter (almost 3 I’ll use v for her name) I love and appreciate my husband, he provides for our family and does a good job taking care of us, he’s a sweet man who has so much potential but he wastes it outside He’s always loved camping/being outside and I thought it was cute at first but at this point I find it hard ... 5. You're NTA. This discussion really should have been done in private, but your husband chose not only to do it in public, but in front of the person affected. You didn't embarrass your husband in front of his friends, he did. That being said, please notice the red flags he's waving. Aug 5, 2022 · A reddit AITA got behind a woman whose husband doesn't care about her fire phobia. Getty Images/EyeEm. It’s not easy to be vulnerable. Sharing your fears, feelings, or straight-up trauma can ... Jul 5, 2018 · Specialk9 * July 5, 2018 at 11:59 am. Thirding this. I did everything OP did. What helped was my partner plugging away at some skills he thought (rightly) he needed before applying, then going to a career transition pro, who reviewed his resume and walked him through the interview questions and answers (including saying basically, totally get why you want to ask those pointed questions, but ... Pretty much this. NTA, of course. But that's almost besides the point. The real question isn't whether OP is an asshole or not. It's whether her husband is so psychotically cruel that he'd intentionally torment kids who just lost their father, or if he is just too dumb to realize that he unintentionally tormented said kids and absolutely should apologize profusely, repeatedly, and ASAP. My husband said that he was just being there for the kids despite the fact he never had a good relationship with my children's father --- My ex husband was a good man, he wasn't the malicious type and he had always adored our kids and went to great lengths to provide them with a good life, it was rough while dealing with illness so he was and ... What starts off as just a couple viewpoints that are a ‘little’ toxic and a ‘tad’ extreme becomes an entire identity based in anger and hatred. It is poison to children. Every single one of my fathers children struggles with mental health issues, depression, CPTSD, self harm, and even suicidal ideation. He has a long time best friend, Jack (35M) that has been in his life since before my husband and I met. I like him well enough. The two of them have always been close and spent such a large amount of time together that, at one point, I was almost starting to suspect that my husband was lying about his whereabouts and was actually with another ... Dec 16, 2022 · Case in point: a recent AITA post about Christmas party invitations and a difficult husband with over 6,000 commenters calling the husband an asshole. Svetikd / Getty Images. On AITA, people share ... NTA. In my household once you are 10, you do your own laundry. If my 10 year old boys can do laundry, your grown man can do laundry. Now I have one two adults sons who do their own laundry and a just turned 9 year old who is almost there. And my husband has always done his own. The only thing I or hubby do for the house is towels and linens. Also, please be assured I do NOT think I am low-value in any way. I let my husband make me think less of myself on some levels for a short time but now I truly see it was a "him" problem. Obviously we don't share the same goals and values and he has become someone I don't recognize. I know the divorce won't be fun or easy, but I will be okay. My husband just happened to walk by and when he saw me searching his pants pockets. He rushed in yelling at me to put his pants down. I already had a folded piece of paper out but he snatched it then started screaming at me about how I have no respect for his privacy and that I shouldn't be getting my hands on his things.So my husband cheated WITH me when we first met and I think there’s still some deep rooted insecurities there. Thanks again for all of the input Update: IATA. I’ve apologized for violating his privacy. And we’ve talked about my insecurities and how looking through his phone is not the answer. Thanks everyone You keep saying he doesn’t leave the house, but that’s his choice, he’s a SAHD. You leaving your house for vacation would be the same for him. He also does all the work around the house. You sound like a misogynist with the reversal of these gender stereotypes. It does not seem like you enjoy your husband’s company. I (31F) work, my husband is a stay at home husband. I love my job, hate house chores and earn well enough to support us both. It's very much OUR money, we both contribute to this family, just not in the same way. Surprisingly my grandparents are a lot more understanding of our situation than people our age. My husband (48M) and I (38F) were at the shopping mall to do some errands. We had to pick up some dry cleaning and tailored items, as well as do some grocery shopping. Problem is, they are both at opposite ends of the shopping centre. Instead of wasting time and doing it together, we both decided to split up, and after I had collected the dry ... • 43 min. ago by Gromitthedog AITA for looking at my husband's search history and finding he signed up for dating sites? My husband (46m) and I (48f) have been married for 4 years with the last year separated and trying to work things out.

But I tried. And my husband supported me. My mental health improved greatly with his support, although I still had a myriad of other issues making holding a job difficult. After having my son, I had multiple surgeries to save my life, and we decided I would take a break from working and focus of recovery and parenthood. . Rhode island

Jul 5, 2018 · Specialk9 * July 5, 2018 at 11:59 am. Thirding this. I did everything OP did. What helped was my partner plugging away at some skills he thought (rightly) he needed before applying, then going to a career transition pro, who reviewed his resume and walked him through the interview questions and answers (including saying basically, totally get why you want to ask those pointed questions, but ... Read this before contacting the mod team. My (23F) husband (27M) and I have been together for 5 years, married for 3. We’re both athletic people, so we’ve been planning a holiday for the past year, without going into major details it’s an expensive (by my standards) holiday and it would’ve involved a lot of hiking, I was looking forward ... Saying he doesn't want another child because you can't handle the workload is a complete joke. He is a father and should be contributing. At the very least, the two of you need counselling. You need to have a hard look at what you are getting out of this relationship while you are completely supporting him. Daily uploads: https://www.youtube.com/c/redditdude?sub_confirmation=1Leave comments, Like and Subscribe!Love to hear your feedbacks on how we can improve th...Both-Enthusiasm708 Partassipant [1] • 7 mo. ago. NTA when someone is the affair partner, for however long, they have to accept that their place is not that of a family member. An AP is less than in the hierarchy in this situation, they have no legal or moral rights, that's what one accepts when they are the AP. YTA. This is pretty controlling behavior. I turned my search history off when I was doing research on proposals....he could literally be doing anything.3. Okay this one could be a cultural thing. My dad's side of the family has events 3+ times a week and they're super important in their eyes. My mom's side we see each other at funerals, weddings and holidays. My immediate family always tried to strike a balance, but often it pissed off dad's side. Both-Enthusiasm708 Partassipant [1] • 7 mo. ago. NTA when someone is the affair partner, for however long, they have to accept that their place is not that of a family member. An AP is less than in the hierarchy in this situation, they have no legal or moral rights, that's what one accepts when they are the AP. You keep saying he doesn’t leave the house, but that’s his choice, he’s a SAHD. You leaving your house for vacation would be the same for him. He also does all the work around the house. You sound like a misogynist with the reversal of these gender stereotypes. It does not seem like you enjoy your husband’s company. My husband said that he was just being there for the kids despite the fact he never had a good relationship with my children's father --- My ex husband was a good man, he wasn't the malicious type and he had always adored our kids and went to great lengths to provide them with a good life, it was rough while dealing with illness so he was and ... Judgement_Bot_AITA • 1 min. ago. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: My husband said I upset him when I said he didn't plan anything. Jul 5, 2018 · Specialk9 * July 5, 2018 at 11:59 am. Thirding this. I did everything OP did. What helped was my partner plugging away at some skills he thought (rightly) he needed before applying, then going to a career transition pro, who reviewed his resume and walked him through the interview questions and answers (including saying basically, totally get why you want to ask those pointed questions, but ... I'll preface this by saying that my husband (Luke) M32 does not get along with my parents. You can't tell who's right or who's wrong, there's always this ongoing tension between them but can be civil enough to sit together at one table. I recently got an invitation for christmas celebration from my parents. This is your legal right it is your money. If your husband won't accept this you probably need to go to marriage guidance or consider speaking to a lawyer. You certainly need to make sure that your husband is not putting all the excess money away in an account or investments only in his name. 8.9K. 33. My advice would be to focus on your son, ignore your partners family and don’t get involved with anything to do with your former friend. If she reaches out, tell her to please speak to your husband regarding any issues about their shared child. Its not your responsibility to deal with her. 37. 1. One ongoing issue we have is my husband’s frugality. He likes to control my spending and have the final say on how he uses his earnings. It’s worth mentioning that I’ve never used any of his income and have no intention to do so. However, the main point of contention between us is his frequent visits to food banks. Daily uploads: https://www.youtube.com/c/redditdude?sub_confirmation=1Leave comments, Like and Subscribe!Love to hear your feedbacks on how we can improve th...So my husband cheated WITH me when we first met and I think there’s still some deep rooted insecurities there. Thanks again for all of the input Update: IATA. I’ve apologized for violating his privacy. And we’ve talked about my insecurities and how looking through his phone is not the answer. Thanks everyone Aug 5, 2022 · A reddit AITA got behind a woman whose husband doesn't care about her fire phobia. Getty Images/EyeEm. It’s not easy to be vulnerable. Sharing your fears, feelings, or straight-up trauma can ... My advice would be to focus on your son, ignore your partners family and don’t get involved with anything to do with your former friend. If she reaches out, tell her to please speak to your husband regarding any issues about their shared child. Its not your responsibility to deal with her. 37. 1. .

Aita for searching my husband - • 43 min. ago by Gromitthedog AITA for looking at my husband's search history and finding he signed up for dating sites? My husband (46m) and I (48f) have been married for 4 years with the last year separated and trying to work things out.

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